Merry Christmas!

Christmas morning, we made it over to Mom's house to do Christmas with all of us girls and the husbands. We had such a great time opening stockings and then taking group pictures with our matching PJs! Dana did an awesome job picking them out!

Mom's Pretty Tree!

My beautiful Christmas present from Eric! I love you Marc Jacobs!

Eric and I posing how Hailey likes to pose for pictures!

Kid pic

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

White Out Conditions

Ray and Jess made it into town just in time! On Christmas Eve, the snow that the weathermen predicted moved in so fast! All of a sudden it was blizzard like conditions, that snowed us in for the entire night! We loved the extra family time, and Lexi absolutely loved the snow! It was so much fun for her, and so beautiful to look at. 14 inches later....I was ready for it to be gone...

Party like it's 1999

Friday the 18th, we had our Lockwood Annual Christmas Party at Mom's house. We all had such a great time together!

Aunt Cindy

Jake, Hailey and Grandma

Saturday afternoon, Cindy had her graduation from OU, and is now officially a teacher!

Saturday night was our annual Christmas Party with our friends. The theme was pajamas, and it was hilarious to see everyone ready for bed before the party even got started! We had such a great time, and even got a visit from Santa! We did a toast with all of our friends, and played "Dirty Santa." Every year is an unforgettable event, and this year was no exception. Thank you to all of our friends who made the night more special!

It was a blast!

I love Lights!

Tonight we went with my Dad and the Blackburns to Chickasha to see the "Festival of Lights." There's something about that amount of lights that gets you in the Christmas spirit!

At the edge of the beautiful bridge.
Carriage ride!

Ready to Paaartaaaaay!

Im so ready for these next few weeks! There's lots of fun things coming up! Tonight we're going to look at lights with Dad and the Blackburns. Im hoping that everyone else doesn't have the same idea that we do, and maybe we can look at the lights in the carriage!

Tomorrow we have a family Christmas party at Mom's, with lots of Mexican food. Then Saturday is Cindy's college graduation and then our Annual Christmas party! WooHoo! All our time has been spent getting ready for this, b/c I seem to think it's like the party of the century! Or maybe it is....

Next week, my favorite New Yorkers come into town, and stay through Christmas! Eric and I are really looking forward for all of the family to be together in Oklahoma at Christmas. That's never happened!

I'll post pics of the party after Saturday! Merry Christmas!

What's Been Going On?

I haven't been keeping up with everything going on in Eric and I's lives lately. Here's some pics to catch back up!





Eric and I at my company Christmas party at Remington Park

Megan and Liz at the party

Mom and I Thanksgiving

Grandpa and Hailey before we ate dinner.

Hailey with her Uncle Eric before her "I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" performance


Me and my girl!

Tree decorating at Dad's (or Grandpa's if you're Hailey)

I think that about catches us back up! Im almost done with my Christmas shopping. We are looking forward to next weekend because that will be our annual Christmas party with all our friends! Every year we have a blast and I can't wait for this one!!

Thinking Out Loud...

There's a song that I really love, and listen to all the time. Sometimes it has more meaning than others, and right now, for me it's pretty powerful. I want to share the lyrics, but I think that listening to the actual song gives it more meaning. I'll highlight the parts that really seem like they're speaking to me, because right now I feel like I need to remind myself that things don't always go your way, and that's okay. That continuing to believe and perservere will get you where you want to be, or maybe where you need to be. And remembering everything it took to get you there will make you appreciate it so much more...

Lift Me Up

By: Kate Voegele

This road is anything but simple

Twisted like a riddle

I've seen high and I've seen low

So loud, the voices of all my doubts

Telling me to give up,

to pack up and leave town

Even so, I had to believe

Impossible means nothing to me

So can you lift me up

Turn the ashes into flames

‘Cause I have overcome

More than words will ever say

And I've been given hope

That there's a light on up the hall

And that a day will come when the fight is won

And I think that day has just begun

Somewhere, everybody starts there

I'm counting on a small prayer

Lost in a nightmare

But I'm here, and suddenly it's so clear

The struggle through the long years

It taught me to outrun my fears

Everything worth having

Comes with trials worth withstanding

So can you lift me up

Turn the ashes into flames

‘Cause I have overcome

More than words will ever say

And I've been given hope

That there's a light on up the hall

And that a day will come when the fight is won

And I think that day has just begun

Oh lift me up, Oh lift me up

Oh lift me up, Lift me up

Lift me up, Oh Lift me up

Down and out is overrated

I want to be elevated

Looking up is not enough

No, I would rather rise above

So can you lift me up

Turn the ashes into flames

‘Cause I have overcome

More than words will ever say

And I've been given hope

That there's a light on up the hall

And that a day will come when the fight is won

And I think that day has just begun

The End and The Beginning

Eric and I have had a very rough couple of weeks, starting right before Thanksgiving. I started spotting through the holiday weekend, and on Monday the 30th of November, found out that our baby had no heartbeat. Im pretty sure this was the saddest day of my life. Ive never lost an immediate family member (at least not that I have been alive when they died), and now, sadly, I have to say that I have. Wednesday morning, the 2nd of December, I had a D&C. Now I am in the recovery stages physically and emotionally.

I was always trying to prepare myself for the possibility of this happening. It's so much more common than anyone wants to admit, and with so many people close to me having gone through this, I knew when the spotting started that it was very possible it was happening to me. But I really tried not to believe the worst, and I even held on to the thought that everything still COULD be okay when we went to the doctor that Monday. But once it was really over, and the baby was really gone, reality set in that my baby had died.

When asked how Im doing with all of this, my emotions are still all over the place. I try to to hang on to the positives, such as the fact that we know we can get pregnant now. And I really trust God in his decisions, so I know there is a plan for us. But I will forever miss this baby, and I think I will always be a little bit sad, wondering what it would've looked like, would it have been a boy or girl...things like that.

In some ways, this is the end of a big part of our trials this past year and a half. It's the end of wondering whether it's possible for us to get pregnant, but it's also the end of our first baby's life. While we deal with this tough time, we are also looking towards the beginning. It's the beginning of trying again, and we are looking forward to the possibilities.

Thanks for all the prayers, calls, texts, emails, hugs, flowers....everything. We truly have an amazing family and group of friends that we surround ourselves with, and we are so lucky for what we have.